gourmet meal for one?

i ate a gourmet dinner tonight. at least i felt like it was gourmet. it was the first time in a couple months that i've fixed an entire balanced meal for myself, a nice one, put it all on a plate together, and sat at the kitchen table to eat it. i know, i know. i'm totally guilty of grabbing some of this, eating it, going back to the kitchen for a little of something else, then eating that, and going back for one last little bit. often eating down in my room and running back upstairs, and often all out of the same bowl (rinsing between, don't worry).

i know that's not how food should be eaten, and it's certainly not how i enjoy it most. but in a culture of busy busy and making the most of every minute, sometimes even mealtimes become opportunities to multitask in the world of a single gal.

today i had an abundance of time, a rarity. i spent the afternoon sitting out at alki in the sunshine, reading and thinking and praying, trying to figure out where i'm going to live starting in july. on my way home i stopped at one of the houses that i'm looking into. it's the first time i've seen it, and it's charming. wood floors, french doors, a fireplace, a goldenrod yellow exterior. basically i'd be renting a room on the main floor, and the main leasers would be living downstairs in the basement. i'd have my own bathroom, and they would really only be upstairs to use the kitchen. it's newly renovated, well-kept, and stylish. there are big closets, tall ceilings, and windows. and it's totally affordable. it would be like having a nice house and nice kitchen practically all to myself (they don't cook much).

yes, this is all relevant to the gourmet dinner. stick with me.

tonight i had salmon patties with capers and a buttermilk sauce, and lentil salad packed with veggies, grapes, and topped with a lemon/evoo dressing. on the side, a handful (or two) of fresh raspberries, and a mint brownie for dessert. i would have taken a picture, but it was all looking so good that i didn't want to run downstairs and get my camera.

i put it all on a plate at the same time (instead of eating in stages), and sat at the table with a glass of water. i had music playing, but didn't get on the computer or on my phone. i just admired the view of the water through the window, and thoroughly enjoyed every bite. the way food should be eaten.

and as i ate i got to thinking. the only thing that would really have made the meal better would have been someone to share it with. cooking for and with people brings me much joy, but my roommates now have such different schedules than me that it only happens once in a blue moon. and then all of a sudden i had this picture in my head of renting the room in that charming house and having a nice, well-kept, stocked kitchen and fixing many delightful meals, only to eat them by myself at the clean and orderly dining room table. (not to say that there wouldn't be people over sometimes, but that wouldn't be every day. and also not to say that i wouldn't have community with my married couple housemates. just thinking out loud here.)

i got to thinking about what it was like to live in community in college. where the 5 of us had roommate dinner once a week, and clean house clean soul every monday. where we sat down and had intentional time together, did daily life things together, sat in the same room and read books. made hot chocolate and watched movies. went on walks and bike rides. stayed up late sitting on someone's bed just talking until entirely too early in the morning. got up before the sun to eat oatmeal and study anatomy flash cards (glad those anatomy lab days are over).

those kinds of things just happen spontaneously when you're living in intentional community. you sit at the same table and sleepily eat your cereal. you fumble over the coffee pot while someone wanders around with half their makeup on, trying to find their other shoe. you laugh together, you cry together, you know what's going on in each other's life, and in that, grow towards the Lord together, just as a result of intentionally sharing space.
so in the end, what benefit is there to nice floors, big closets, and plenty of homecooked food it there's nobody to share it with? it's empty. it's missing out on the beautiful blessing of fellowship. life may be clean and in order, but there's much to learn in the mess. this verse shouts that at me: "where there are no oxen, the manger is clean, but abundant crops come by the strenght of the ox." proverbs 14:4

and though it's regarding a slightly different idea, this quote gives a glimpse into the richness of life that is true community: "i think we delight to praise what we enjoy because the praise not merely expresses but completes the enjoyment; it is its appointed consummation it is not out of compliment that lovers keep on telling one another how beautiful they are; the delight is incomplete until it is expressed." -c.s. lewis

in the same way, i think we fully enjoy things when we do them with other people. we weren't designed to be alone. it's when we get to share an experience that it fully comes to fruition.

so those are my thoughts. maybe i should fix a nice meal and eat it on a plate more often.

my afternoon on alki.

love,

tracey